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Your virginity hangs around your neck like an albatross. Like there’s a great fault within you that’s holding you back but that nobody else seems to have.
What are you supposed to do about the fact that you’re one of the Great Untouched?
The story that we’re supposed to lose our virginity by X milestone doesn’t take into consideration that navigating relationships – romantic, sexual or platonic – can be difficult, stressful, even . Just as the gender police are eager to punish people who don’t live up to the traditional definitions of manhood.Not the details – although I’m fairly certain that losing it on Halloween means I’m secretly Goth – but the drama that surrounded it. I was convinced I was the last male virgin on campus. As far as I was concerned, it was profoundly unfair that everybody else had gotten lucky.I resented it when my more experienced friends would talk about sex and compare their various exploits; it felt to me like they were bragging, showing off in front of someone who couldn’t possibly understand.The fear of being “outed” as a virgin becomes a self-perpetuating cycle.They so fear rejection for being virgins that they can’t bring themselves to approach women.
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Because when we fail to follow the Standard Virginity Loss Narrative, the fault lies with .